Thursday, February 1, 2018
When you separate from a partner, making an agreement for child custody and visitation can be full of tense negotiations and emotional challenges. One parent may end up with limited amounts of time to bond with the children, or a parent may have a reason to have sole custody for the children. During the divorce, you likely negotiated with your partner to find an arrangement that worked.
Unfortunately, now you face the situation where you try to see your kids, but your spouse refuses to comply with the judge’s order. The pain and inconvenience of not being able to see your kids can be upsetting. All you want is the fair chance to have the judge’s order honored. What are the options? In child custody, as in life, there are better and worse ways to handle a problem.
Stop paying child support
You could stop paying child support–that is an option–but certainly not one that anyone recommends. First, the children should not have to suffer simply because the other parent is not following the rules. Child support ensures that the children are safe, secure and supported. Also, a judge is not likely to look favorably on this as an excuse to avoid payments.
Stop following the court order
You could stop following the court order yourself, but it isn’t likely to help your case. You should do everything you can to hold up your end of the bargain and be the responsible parent for your kids. Two wrongs don’t make a right, and you could also escalate any disagreements when you don’t comply.
Talk to your ex
Communication can possibly help. Talk to your co-parent and try to resolve the issue through civil communication if possible. Try to resolve any conflicts peacefully, and if necessary, don’t be afraid to get a mediator involved.
Document the events
Since you are following a judge’s order, you will want to prove your statements about when and where your ex denied you visitation. If you must go back to court, you can demonstrate that your ex is preventing you from seeing your children. Keep written, photo and video records of your attempts to see the children if you can.
Get more help
In a situation that is so fraught with emotion, it can be a challenge to go it alone. It can be hard to stick to the dos and don’ts, or you might get overwhelmed. If you can’t reach a solution peacefully, it could possibly benefit you to reach out to a lawyer.